Husbands often get a rap for being simple and uncomplicated, and while to a degree this is true, it doesn’t mean they don’t have a need for their wives to understand them. As strong and as put together as they may appear on the outside, they can actually quite often battle with inadequacy or the fear of being found out that they aren’t as great as everyone may think they are.
Husbands struggle with the fear of not being good enough as much as wives do.
As a wife, if you want to do your part to pour into the life of your husband, here are a few things they need to hear from you.
I believe in you—Your husband needs to know that you are behind him and that you are believing in him. They truly do care about how you feel about things and your belief in them is a big part of what propels them to do most of the things they do. Remind him of your support frequently.
It’s okay to take time for yourself—Many husbands often feel guilty over their desires to do some things on their own that they enjoy. More often than not, men don’t like sacrificing family time for free time, but just as it is necessary for you, it is also necessary for them to have this time—and your encouragement/permission, helps them to de-stress in their fun and filling ways without feeling all of the guilt.
I appreciate your efforts—More than likely your husband works hard—and it’s also more than likely that their work often looks easy for them. But that doesn’t mean that it is. Sorry men, but you’re known for not revealing your feelings to your wives, so it’s not unlikely that your hubby has work stress that he’s not letting you see. He is probably dealing with some things that he doesn’t want to burden you with, so he keeps them to himself. Your reminder that all of his work efforts and provisions for the family will be much appreciated.
It’s okay that you failed—that doesn’t mean you are a failure. It’s a big deal for most husbands to be really hard on themselves when they mess up or miss the mark. In fact, the fear of failure often keeps many husbands from making bold moves that they would really love to make. Reminding them that their failures are ok and a necessary part of life and totally disconnected to who they are as a person, will go a long way.
I don’t hold the past against you—Wives, put down your scoreboards. Us wives are so good at remembering all.the.things, and it’s not uncommon for us to dump out that whole bag of past mistakes during every argument. Setting that scoreboard down will not only help your husband, it will also provide great freedom for you from carrying it all around. A husband who believes every mistake will be held over his head is a husband who will likely give up and quit trying, because he starts believing that no matter what he does, you will always find something to be unsatisfied with.
At the end of the day, your words hold power over your husband’s life. They can speak life and hope, or they can crush a spirit. A husband who feels believed in, empowered and courageous, is a husband who will impact his family greatly.
If you want to encourage your husband but don’t know the exact words to use, click the link below and get the simplified list of Sweet Things to Say to your Husband.