What do you value? Family? Peace? Your time? Respect? Have you ever thought about a plan on how to protect those things?
In order to be able to set up proper boundaries, you first need to know what it is that needs protecting. The truth about boundaries is that they are all about you and protecting whatever it is that you value. Boundaries get difficult when we make them about others. That’s when we feel the guilt of offending or hurting people, so instead of placing a boundary up we self-sacrifice the things we value to make others feel better.
The basic rules of boundaries are :
· Your family, YOU deal with boundaries with them. Don’t allow your spouse to handle your family. That is your responsibility.
· Know what you value so you can know what you need to protect.
· Predict and plan for the common problems. Set a boundary in place before you even have to deal with it.
To initiate a boundary, you must first ask or state what it is that you want or are willing or not willing to accept. Then you repeat yourself once if needed, and if it is still not respected you initiate an action or consequence.
As we mentioned this episode, we are making available our Boundaries video lesson from our Marriage Holiday Survival Guide (*not available for 2020). Please access it for free by filling out the below...